Rebuilding Trust


Photo by: Ron 


Rebuilding Trust when Trust has been Broken


Some of you are familiar with Love Languages. The book’s “cousin” for business is Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace. I highly recommend it!

Paul White works with Appreciation at Work and he writes a blog that I regularly receive. This month’s edition is entitled


How to Rebuild Trust When

a Relationship has been Damaged


Here’s the link if you choose to read it in its entirety:


Trust is a BIG deal to me, to my business and to my clients. You’ve probably heard me say that


TRUST is slow to gain; easy to lose.


or maybe:


Mistrust breeds much faster than trust.


Nothing original here. Having read the Covey’s, Charles Feltman and a number of others on trust, my conviction only grows that trust is THE currency when it comes to communication and relationship.


In reading Covey(s), we discover that trust is made up of both COMPETENCE and CHARACTER. Trust is built through competency and most quickly eroded due to character. To these two, White adds a third, CONSISTENCY. We’ve all heard of Steady Eddy. If Eddy wore a badge it might read consistency.


Mark’s paraphrased summary of White’ article would be:


To rebuild trust when a relationship is damaged, start by:


  • Clarifying the situation…What happened here?
  • Define your relationship (in a work context): Are you the person’s boss? Are they your boss? Are you peers?


Once you’ve done this work, proceed to Phase II:


  • Pause (take a few deep breaths)
  • Bite your tongue (don’t let yourself “gossip”)
  • Be specific and give specific examples


And, finally:


  • Imagine Positive Possibilities (Dream some What if? Dreams)


Practice White’s process and you give yourself (and therefore your team) at least a shot at restoring trust. Breed it, slowly and then surely. You (and your team) will be glad you did!





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